My Roommates are Religious
my dog is disobedient
my garden is overgrown
my music is sophisticated
my jeans are “disgusting”
my parents are sober
my boyfriend is drunk
my shampoo is slimy
my apple is shiny
my tattoo is permanent
my hair dye is not
my shower is icy
my veins are lightning
my t-shirt is cool
my friends are lame
my pen is purple
my hairs are splitting
my piano is overworked
my washing machine is dying
my brother is lying
(god damn it) my cup is empty
my room is messy
my cat is stressing
my liver is nervous
my heart is feral
my mind is vacant
my journal is full
my garden is overgrown
my music is sophisticated
my jeans are “disgusting”
my parents are sober
my boyfriend is drunk
my shampoo is slimy
my apple is shiny
my tattoo is permanent
my hair dye is not
my shower is icy
my veins are lightning
my t-shirt is cool
my friends are lame
my pen is purple
my hairs are splitting
my piano is overworked
my washing machine is dying
my brother is lying
(god damn it) my cup is empty
my room is messy
my cat is stressing
my liver is nervous
my heart is feral
my mind is vacant
my journal is full
Some things I have wanted for a while now
I want a banana phone
and I want my best friend, Andrea
to have a banana phone, too
that way, we can call each other
and I want to hold an American flag high above my head with my arms stretched up
but a little bent
and the sun in my hair and soft on my skin
I want an imaginary friend
that I actually believe is real
so if you know one,
please tell him/her to submit an application
to my mailbox assoonaspossible with a response to the following essay question:
what makes a good friend
I want to walk on a plane and
end up in Belo Horizonte when I walk off,
even though I didn’t mean to
I want to know why endorphins are good for you
I mean I know why, kinda,
but really, how do they work?
I want to know someone cares about me as much
as I care about them
ugh I want a boyfriend
I would want a banana phone for him, too
because then we could three-way call with Andrea, him, and me
or he and I could just talk on our banana phones
while I let my hair dangle off the side of my bed
I guess that would mean that he and Andrea could just talk, too
with Andrea’s hair dangling
well let’s not think about it
I want to end a speech with a really controversial thing
and have everyone in the crowd get rowdy all at once
and for the authorities to have to escort me off the stage
I want to tell Alanis that I think she’s the shit and her song about one hand being in her
pocket and the other doing a bunch of hippie activities is very relatable to me
I want to tell my childhood best friend I’m in love with him
I want to get a good grade on my linear algebra test
without studying
I want to play the ukelele for twenty-four hours straight without even stopping to eat or
sleep or explain to anyone
and I want there to be no social consequences for this
I want to get really close to some people and not break their hearts
I want to name an important roadway after something other than myself
I want to wear clothes that other people think are ugly but I myself like
I want to know why we exist
and I’m interested in the order in which the people leave the party
I want to be able to take the stairs when I am one-hundred
I want to live to be one-hundred
I want to tell my roommate that she actually did wake me up
when she came home at three thirty
I want to email president Obama
and receive a timely response
I want someone to make me laugh until I can’t even repeat the joke because I’ll just start
laughing too hard
I want to have summer goals
I want to know what it is like to be a boy
I want to discover a conditioner that actually works
I want to take the blame for something I didn't do
I want to tell everyone I have ever known
why I am happy I knew them
more immediately,
I want to fall asleep before two AM tonight
and I want my best friend, Andrea
to have a banana phone, too
that way, we can call each other
and I want to hold an American flag high above my head with my arms stretched up
but a little bent
and the sun in my hair and soft on my skin
I want an imaginary friend
that I actually believe is real
so if you know one,
please tell him/her to submit an application
to my mailbox assoonaspossible with a response to the following essay question:
what makes a good friend
I want to walk on a plane and
end up in Belo Horizonte when I walk off,
even though I didn’t mean to
I want to know why endorphins are good for you
I mean I know why, kinda,
but really, how do they work?
I want to know someone cares about me as much
as I care about them
ugh I want a boyfriend
I would want a banana phone for him, too
because then we could three-way call with Andrea, him, and me
or he and I could just talk on our banana phones
while I let my hair dangle off the side of my bed
I guess that would mean that he and Andrea could just talk, too
with Andrea’s hair dangling
well let’s not think about it
I want to end a speech with a really controversial thing
and have everyone in the crowd get rowdy all at once
and for the authorities to have to escort me off the stage
I want to tell Alanis that I think she’s the shit and her song about one hand being in her
pocket and the other doing a bunch of hippie activities is very relatable to me
I want to tell my childhood best friend I’m in love with him
I want to get a good grade on my linear algebra test
without studying
I want to play the ukelele for twenty-four hours straight without even stopping to eat or
sleep or explain to anyone
and I want there to be no social consequences for this
I want to get really close to some people and not break their hearts
I want to name an important roadway after something other than myself
I want to wear clothes that other people think are ugly but I myself like
I want to know why we exist
and I’m interested in the order in which the people leave the party
I want to be able to take the stairs when I am one-hundred
I want to live to be one-hundred
I want to tell my roommate that she actually did wake me up
when she came home at three thirty
I want to email president Obama
and receive a timely response
I want someone to make me laugh until I can’t even repeat the joke because I’ll just start
laughing too hard
I want to have summer goals
I want to know what it is like to be a boy
I want to discover a conditioner that actually works
I want to take the blame for something I didn't do
I want to tell everyone I have ever known
why I am happy I knew them
more immediately,
I want to fall asleep before two AM tonight
Things I heard the dishwashers say (tuesday)
have you ever seen the Statue of Liberty?
no, have you?
no.
no, have you?
no.
Things I heard the dishwashers say (friday)
so, you’re going to see your mom tomorrow?
yeah.
how is she, anyway?
the same.
yeah.
how is she, anyway?
the same.